It’s time to make my dreams come true.

15 Oct

Yup. You got that right. Even though a lot of shit has happened in my life and I felt pretty bad about it, always blaming myself and the people involved in my problems, I realized that living on hate and selfishness would not do me good. It will only bring more pain and sadness, which I’m sick and tired of feeling and enduring. For once, I want to make my dreams come true and make myself happy.

Our house renovation is finished and I think my mom and my little sister will be financially stable now, which means I can finally save money for myself. I really want to go back to school, finish my damn major and work abroad, preferably in Japan. I know I can make that dream happen if I work hard for it. I mean, Cody did it so why can’t I?

I don’t want to live a life full of regrets. As the saying goes, it’s better to live a life full of ‘oh wells’ than ‘what-ifs’. I want to try my best to make my dreams happen and be happy. I don’t wanna be alone anymore and drown in my own self misery. I’m going to fucking change and be myself from now on. 🙂

I finally got the notice today!

14 Oct

Woohoo! I got the notice today! I’m so fucking happy! *does happy dance* But I’d have to wait till next week to claim it because the EMS office is closed on weekends and I’d probably get to get it on Wednesday because I don’t have money yet. But whatever, at least my TOXIC cd is almost within my reach. I just hope I’m not going to pay a lot for it. Please! Please! Please!

A Rotten System

13 Oct

I know there are some scandals about Customs employees stealing parcels and packages these days but do they really have to delay ALL incoming packages for one frigging week? Fuck that.

So I called the EMS center again and the customer service rep I talked to said that the Bureau of Customs are holding all incoming packages in the order of their new general post master–whatever you call him or her. I think this sudden decision has something to do with smuggled goods and stuff. Of course, I was pissed to know that and I thought that I might never get my package. But the lady was kind enough to tell me that they mind receive orders from customs to acquire parcels sent through EMS by tomorrow, and I am really hoping for that. She also told me she will contact me just in case they have my parcel and I could pick it up already.

Damn, how long do I have to wait to get my TOXIC cd? Sometimes I think that I’ll never get to receive it. But I’ll never give up. I’ll do everything I can to get it even if I have to pay a huge amount of tax (even though I wish I wouldn’t) just to get it. Please, please let everything be okay. Please.

I need to wait more.

12 Oct

So my TOXIC CD still didn’t arrive today, which really sucked because again, I was expecting that it will. But since PhilPost and the Bureau of Customs had failed me again, I’ve decided to call the EMS Office here in the Philippines. I called three fucking numbers, two of which were not working. Luckily, the last number I tried were still working and a customer service rep from EMS answered. She told me that my frigging parcel is still held in BOC and is currently under inspection. She also said it would be for pick-up and that I should wait to receive a claim voucher tomorrow. If I don’t receive one, I hafta call them again and wait for their next instruction, which most likely would be me going to their office to get a frigging claim voucher from them and then go to the BOC office to claim my package and pay for the necessary fees.

Necessary fees…

My head frigging hurts just thinking how much they’ll be asking me for the tax, storage fee and other shiteous things they’d charge me. I have a feeling it would reach more than a thousand but I hope it won’t. I hope to god it won’t because I don’t have enough money right now and my mom would be so fucking pissed off me once she finds out I spend more than a hundred dollars for it.

I just want to hold my damn CD in my hands, and kiss it and listen to it and look at the photo book and… and…

Fuck you, Bureau of Customs!

11 Oct

So it has been almost a fucking week since CDJapan has shipped my TOXIC CD. The tracking website said it has already arrived in the Philippines and is currently being inspected by Customs. It has been two days since it arrived in the Customs office and it still hasn’t arrived or sent to my city’s local post office.

Well, fuck me.

Does it really take two fucking days to inspect a small bloody box? Why the hell didn’t they do it to when CDJapan sent my copy of ‘Remember the Urge’? I don’t know what the fuck is up with them but they better not mess with me. I’m not in the fucking mood to deal with their shit or pay a huge amount of unnecessary tax for a frigging CD.

But again, maybe I’m just being too paranoid or excited ‘coz I’ve waited for more than a bloody month to hold my copy in my frigging hands and things are not going my way right now! All I want is to fucking receive it so I could finally rape the shit out of it and get my money’s worth!

So this goes to the Bureau of fucking Customs in the Philippines. Fuck you and your system! Go fucking die and rot in hell!

Skype Conversations: Part 2

9 Oct

As planned, Aila, my dear bb, and I had a chat thru Skype today. At first, we tried video chatting on Facebook–I had no idea that was possible in that damn site, but we did it anyway. Since it was our first time to talk and actually see each other thru video, I felt shy as hell, especially when I heard her voice. It was so beautiful and deep for a fourteen year old. Anyway, since my connection was slow as a goddamn turtle, we decided to continue our chat thru Skype.

The connection was still frigging bad, like it gets cut off every five to ten frigging seconds but I could hear and see her clearly. She introduced me to her mom and to her cute little sister while I introduced my baby sister as well. We talked about a lot of random stuff but mostly we talked about our fanfics, Bleach and of course, the GazettE! I’m so frigging glad I made her a fan, hahaha! And she likes Aoi, OMFG!!! XDD

Because we practically share the same interest, our coversation was really fun. We talked for more than two hours despite the bad connection and laughed our asses off while fangirling. It feels really nice to have someone who can understand you and share the same things as you. It just sucks that she lives in America but I hope we can meet each other someday if she would go back home here for a vacation. I’d really like to be with her. 🙂

Damn, I hope it’s the weekend already so I could talk to her again.

On another note, my cat Pabby finally has a mate but alas! He’s too hostile towards my sister’s female cat who’s trying her best to lure him! Argh! Stupid cat! I hope he’s not frigging gay because we want to have kittens!!! XD


Thank you, Skype~

8 Oct

I was able to chat with my friend who’s now in Japan today thru Skype and of course, our conversation was fun. She was still her crazy-ass self and she cheerfully talked about her experience in the land of our dreams. She also showed me the free magazine that featured the GazettE and I can’t wait to get my hands on it!

We mainly talked about the GazettE and was happy to know that one of her co-trainees is a big fan of Visual Kei bands. She said she liked Reita and was very fascinated with his nose. She also talked about her job, which I think is not that difficult and some negative things like discrimination. She seemed sad about it but not sad enough to mull over it. Anyway, she said she and her friend is planning to watch one of the GazettE’s concert this November and I’m so effing jealous! I wish I can also go to Japan and watch them!!!

Also, Japan Post have finally updated the tracking website. My TOXIC DVD has arrived here in the Philippines but I’d have to wait till Monday or Tuesday for it! But that’s alright. At least, I know it’s already here so my beloved will be in my hands real soon! Yay!


Getting more impatient and worried.

8 Oct

The tracking info for my package is not fucking updating. It has been more than a day since the last update came and said that my TOXIC CD was dispatched from the Tokyo Post Office but there’s no new info about my package’s whereabouts. *not amused*

Where the fuck is it?

I need to know.

I’m getting worried and scared that I might not be able to receive it. No! I don’t want to! I need to have it! I spent a hundred dollars just to buy it! I’m going to die if it gets lost somewhere and I can’t receive it! Noooooooooooooooo!!! I hope the site will update soon, let me know that it has already arrived in the Philippines! Is it taking time because it’s the weekend and maybe the Customs Office doesn’t have work today? I sure hope that’s the reason. Please update me where my TOXIC DVD is!!! *crosses fingers*

More patience…

7 Oct

CDJapan finally shipped the TOXIC CD I ordered, but alas, they shipped it yesterday and it was only dispatched from the Tokyo Post Office this morning, which means it will probably arrive in the Philippines tomorrow and will be delivered to my doorstep on Monday… or Tuesday.

I am getting really impatient because I’m really, really excited! I watched and downloaded the PV of Suicide Circus this morning and drooled over the GazettE’s sexiness, especially Uruha’s arms! His arms are so effing beautiful and yummy and I have this really strong urge to lick his underarm, really! I want to watch the DVD and rape the replay button, dammit! I want to look at the photobook and marvel at everyone’s epicness in there! Most of all, I want to play the crap out of the CD! But it still hasn’t arrived yet and it seems I have no choice but to wait until next week! No! I don’t want to! But I don’t have any choice! *cries*

On a positive note, TOXIC entered the Oricon Charts at number 3! YAY! *throws confetti* I believe it has beaten DIM, which peaked the Oricon charts on the 5th position . Anyway, this makes me and a lot of fans happy. Even though a lot of fans (and haters) say the album sucks and it’s the beginning of the GazettE’s fall, the rank it got begged to differ! YAY! I’m so happy for the GazettE! I hope their rank will go up like #2 or #1!!!

TOXIC is out! Yay! But…

6 Oct

fucking CDJapan still hasn’t shipped my copy yet. I understand that they encountered problems with the actual weight of the album and the actual shipping price, but why the fuck do they have to spend so long in sending me a notification mail about the new shipping fee and the fucking notice that they’ve shipped my copy! I want my copy, dammit! I want to touch it and kiss it and rape it but it still hasn’t arrived yet!

I am losing my fucking patience and I hate CDJapan because they should’ve computed/known the real product weight before the release date! Now I’d have to wait until next week for my TOXIC CD to arrive! ARGH!!!